DANBURY, Conn. - A snake was found in the divorce courtroom in Danbury, Conn., and no, it wasn't someone's spouse.


zing!

StuffInABucket: josh if i said "brb i have to pee" would you consider that to be too much info?
lubcha132: yes
StuffInABucket: alright
StuffInABucket: ....brb. i have to go pee.
lubcha132: you did that to spite me

DolphnLuv9: ben is shrieking (editor's note..he's 5)
DolphnLuv9: lol
lubcha132: why?
DolphnLuv9: cuz hes ben
lubcha132: ohhh ok
DolphnLuv9: he doesn't need a reason
lubcha132: i wish i could do that
lubcha132: what's marc up to? (note: he's almost 7)
DolphnLuv9: being unsually quiet --- probably hiding some of my shoes

lubcha132: and as a sophisticated gentleman, i am not one to be tacky
DolphnLuv9: "sophisticated" if thats what u wanna call it

someone: tell me something
lubcha132: i'm changing my sheets
someone: right now? no wait i mean something u wouldnt tell ne1 else
lubcha132: no one else knows

In the name of Eliron:

"So, in which hand do you hold pudding before making the bracha?"-student
"The spoon with pudding in it goes in the right hand"-R' Komet
"What if the pudding falls off the spoon?"- student
"Then I reccomend you see an ocupational therapist, maybe they will be able to help you maximize the Mu of your pudding?"-R' Komet
"What's Mu?"-Eliron
"It is the frictional coefficient."-R' Komet

Rockie1015 (8:56:05 PM): wuts going on
lubcha132 (8:56:06 PM): what's going on?

UltimateSOAD22: i got 2 pet mice 2day! ones albine and the other just has red eyes! its sooo sick!!!!!! i came home and doron(my 10 year old bro) goes mike we got gerbils(poor him, he thinks there gerbils but there rele mice)
lubcha132: he'll learn in time

Auto response from UltimateSOAD22: playin with my new mice(gerbils if doron asks)

STAND UP: You are a natural stand-up comedian. You
watch the news with people, and when you give
your opinions, people start laughing. They are
not laughing at you, they are laughing because
what you say is so TRUE. The world is a very
funny place, full of natural comedy. All you do
is repeat various humorous things that you
notice from everyday life. Your unique
perspective on the world is what makes you so
funny. Of all the various comedy types, you may
be the funniest of them all!

PREMIUM COMEDY OF YOUR TYPE IS WELCOMED AT:
http://pub98.ezboard.com/bkickbanned


How funny are you?
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BERRY87: ok....planet of the apes II...later

Bling2xx (8:38:55 AM): hey
lubcha132 (8:38:55 AM): hey

Drums87: i told my parents we rode the loop
Drums87: they're like the one we forbid you from riding?
lubcha132: did they die of shock?
Drums87: i'm like ya that's the one
Drums87: but i told them how freakin cool it was and they calmed down

BERRY87: btw, i saw ben c and shira w at j2...it was so embarrassing, i'm like, "hey" and then my dad walks up behind me, "oh so u guys are going for pizza?" and they just look at me like, "this guys wierd"
lubcha132: LOL
lubcha132: that's like meeting someone at the satmar mikveh
lubcha132: "so...going for a dunk?"
BERRY87: worse
lubcha132: "no i'm here to look around"
BERRY87: LOL

BNK2124: harvard crimson tide
lubcha132: = blood flow

lubcha132: clash of the titans
BobbyHo36: go claymation
lubcha132: we gotta see that
BobbyHo36: the special effects were years behind their time

BERRY87: i think we should find a way to carry fire in a jar, and walk around with it

lubcha132: what kind of garden grows the most vegetables?
YoYaW87: FLASH GARDEN!!!!

on behalf of myself and the entire HP senior NCSY chapter, please explain this joke.

so the funniest thing ever is when a guy on the radio says something funny, and in the background some guy starts cackling.

mav3469: I LOVE YOUR BLOG SHIT
mav3469: that vorange thing is fucking hilarious (see 15.10.03)

C aM eL fA cT: yo y the hell dont u answer ur fone
TiPmE39: ...
TiPmE39: cause i dont like u.

Teammate Brendan Shanahan called Whitney the night after he signed and gave him some pointers.


"I usually call the new guy and let him know where I like to sit on the bus, tell him ways he can stay out of my way, make sure he knows not to touch any of my stuff," Shanahan said.

lubcha132: and you take the V train
lubcha132: V as in Vorange
lubcha132: b/c the train is orange
lubcha132: so you can remember it that way

"Claude Lapointe tripped over his cat, tumbled down a flight of steps, and sprained his right ankle."

Auto response from TiPmE39: i ka feew mei wip, i ka feew mei wip. Wisum eef out ooday. ineresin esperence, bu i ka feew mei wip an blood al aver and sit. Thi definly challan for ackin nes foo days.i got gauve in mei mouf alto. kakaka thx

lubcha132: now that is an away message
Auto response from DolphnLuv9: I can't talk, I can't swallow, and I can't breath through my nose. Please bring chicken soup over.

Big Boo-tay!


Which B-Movie Badass Are You?
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what?!

Auto response from DolphnLuv9: STOP MAKING FUN OF ME OR I'LL BITE YOU!!! (Marc and David and Josh)

Bling2xx (4:38:05 PM): ey
lubcha132 (4:38:05 PM): hey

Dzel81: y was route 9 closed
lubcha132: no one knows
lubcha132: if we asked they'd probably say "police investigation"
Dzel81: yeah
lubcha132: "are you sure the contact fell out on route 9?"
Dzel81: why would they be burtally honest and say some drunk dude mowed someone down
lubcha132: b/c then people would want to see it
Dzel81: i know i would
lubcha132: "due to a three car pile up with several fatalities and AIDS-infected blood spilled onto the highway"
lubcha132: "a propane truck collided with a bunny rabbit truck...the smell of burned fur stifling rescue attempts"
Dzel81: hahahahahahaha
lubcha132: nothing to report on route 18 tho

lubcha132: "what are you doing online at 11 o'clock?"
Bling2xx: yeah thatbmy parrents
lubcha132: did you get the "you're not going to get up in the morning" bit yet
Bling2xx: oooooooooooo yeha
lubcha132: "don't ever ask me to do anything for you" ?
Bling2xx: yes and those were the exact words
Bling2xx: wow

BERRY87: i would have laughed so much harder if it was blt* that played
lubcha132: you have to admit "turning japanese" in the middle of a yeshiva college fair was priceless

* "bizzare love triangle" by New Order